Day 9: Nostalgia

1. Today I woke up feeling less pain than yesterday, but still pain.
2. People from my job are definitely noticing I am not there, not sure how I will deal with that part of the humility. Not sure I care what they think too much.
3. Mr. K took me with him to visit clients and proudly showed me off to people he has known for years. It made me feel beyond special, beyond pretty, and important. I never felt like I deserved to be shown off or talked about before.
   
4. I have been able to speak to my mom and dad more.. I just preface things that are hard by saying "This is hard for me to say but I am going to say it.. "
5. I'm not sure how much the parents understand the value of N.A. and what it is doing for me. I am starting to feel like I have a support system beyond my usual family and friends.. someone to call when I don't feel like talking to Mr. K or parents. I think that is important.. These meetings and people are soo Real and so Raw and it inspires me and shows me that there is no need to pretend to be something your not.
   
6. I extended myself to one of the members tonight.. somebody that in my past I would easily judge and never even say Hello to.... We are all misunderstood.. I felt good about it and might gain a new friend.. even if he is from a different kind of life.
   
7. I have my interview with OP tomorrow... I am nervous.. I feel like this is the final goodbye and I am afraid that I might see them again.. but I can only be here and now and that is what is important... or so I am told.
   
8. I promise myself that I am going to run by the bay tomorrow before the interview to clear my head...

*I chose the picture at the top because it makes me happy. It is a picture of Swami Vishnu Devananda's peace plane. He flew this plane into every country around the world with the message of peace... something we as individuals and as a world are still very far from.